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Astrological Services:

Personal Astrological Readings:

Birth chart readings, including a two-year forecast, last about 90 minutes to two hours, and are $100.00. During this time, I will try to answer any questions you have concerning relationships, career, health issues, and the timing of events in your life, for example, when to sell a house, when to apply for a new job, etc.

Couples Readings:

Drag your romantic partner along to a reading! Your strengths and challenges as a couple will be shown to you in what astrology calls the art of "synastry." $100.00 gets you 90 minutes with me, and this may save you millions in the future!

Parties:

I'm available for your party, provided I'm not having one of my own on the same day. If you are having a group of friends over, give me their birth data in advance, and I'll be able to give readings with a strong dose of humor to the delight of your guests (hopefully!!). Chart printouts included. $100.00 per hour.

Computer Reports:

There are two reports that I've come to like, and I offer them inexpensively:

1) Heaven Knows What -- Based on Grant Lewi's seminal work, this report is the best basic computer astrology report I've seen. A great overview of your astrological traits, it also has forecasts for two years. ~ 28 pages. $19.95

2) Midpoint Keys -- The future of astrology is harmonics, midpoints, and planetary trees. This report gives highly fine-tuned anaylses and gets very specific to your individual talents and character. Two years of forecasts accompany this report. ~ 85 pages. $34.95.

Both HKW and MK reports: $44.95.

3) Astro-Locality -- Whether you are planning to travel or move permanently, this report will identify favorable and unfavorable localities according to your birth chart. Detailed maps and color-coded references make this report easy to use. ~ 14 pages. $29.95.

Readings can be done in person or over the phone for no extra charge.

Please contact me by phone -- (760) 644-5461 or by email -- ed @ edkohout.com, so we can discuss a your reading and set up a time. Phone readings require payment in advance.

Cash, checks, money orders, and credit cards are accepted.

STANDARD DISCLAIMER:

Astrology is an ancient concept, but modern USAnian legal edicts handed down by the gods of government force me to say that under no circumstances should any astrological activity by me be considered anything other than for entertainment purposes. I have no license for my craft, nor is it sanctioned by any professional controlling legal authority. I will not diagnose anything, nor will I proscribe anything.

Founding fathers and mothers left us a mandate
We've got to separate the church and the state
So get your head straight before it's too late
And you drop it in the plate, you must appreciate




Jesus and money make a man speak in tongues
Scream out his lungs, roll in the dung
And when the song is sung, he moves up another rung
And the deaf and the dumb are the ones who get stung

Here comes the sex police, they're at your bedroom door
Movin' in next door, searchin' from floor to floor
You know what they're lookin' for
Someone's always keepin' score every time you dip the oar

Love isn't fun no more

Fascist christ, come to the rescue
Gimme that old time religion, here it comes

Let's get fundamental about this strange philosophy
In which god and man are enemies
In which there is no serenity unless you happen to believe
Precisely what they want you to believe, and no diversity

Come join the army and learn the noises
That drown out the others' voices and please the devil
Who rejoices when mankind has no choices
And power exploits us, and peace avoids us

Guess who to the rescue on a holy mission
To uphold the tradition of the Spanish Inquisition
And preempt your decision by forcing your confession
Now let that be a lesson

Who do you think you're messin' with?

Somebody took our god away


Todd Rundgren

Is anybody happier
Because you passed his way?
Does anyone remember
That you spoke to him today?

The day is almost over,
And its toiling time is through;
Is there anyone to utter now
A kindly word of you?

Can you say tonight, in parting
With the day that's slipping fast,
That you helped a single brother
Of the many that you passed?

Is a single heart rejoicing
Over what you did or said;
Does the man whose hopes were fading,
Now with courage look ahead?

Did you waste the day, or lose it?
Was it well or sorely spent?
Did you leave a trail of kindness,
Or a scar of discontent?

As you close your eyes in slumber,
Do you think that God will say,
"You have earned one more tomorrow
By the work you did today"?

-- Anonymous

Copyright 2002-2008 Edward Kohout. All Rights Reserved.
ed @ edkohout.com